Carpe Diem

In healthcare, the best part of the job is always the patients. In the nursing home, everyone has their favorites, and even favorites are subject to change depending on the day, the circumstances, or the meds (or lack thereof) being administered!

I love Mr. D! He's the one that drives everyone else crazy with his hollering and screaming, his pinning for his deceased wife, and his incontinence. But I simply adore him! Today was his day on my favorites list. He's a constant favorite for me, because we are a lot alike. Mr. D is an overachiever. He served as a fighter pilot in Vietnam and Korea. He is a business owner. He has an air of assertiveness, but he can be gentle, caring, and kind. He is a wealth of knowledge and wisdom! He knows a lot about a lot!

Today, I had the opportunity to sit down and talk with him. He spoke with me about his life and how he felt he had lost his purpose. He told me that his plans for his life did not align with the plans his family had for him. He said he was frustrated because he in essence had no plans. I gently tried to get him to delve a bit deeper by asking questions. I wanted to know what his plans were, what he wanted to do most, and if he felt like a failure. He said he wanted to travel: South America and Southern France were at the top of his list. He said he was alone, old, and had no plans for the future. He was proud of his accomplishments, yet he wanted more! Still, he kept using the word "plans." For Mr. D, it's not about the desitination, it's about the journey. Simply having a goal in mind, and pursuing that goal, was enough to keep him young, fresh, vibrant...alive!

The most profound thing he said to me was this: "I just long for things that ought to be, that will probably never be." I tried to reassure him. I tried to give him hope. A hopeless man is a dying man.

He then asked me what my plans were. We sat in silence for what seemed like eternity, until I realized that my shift was quickly coming to an end, and I had a few more patients that needed tending to. At the end of the day as I headed for the exit door, I stopped by Mr. D's room to wish him a good evening, and to tell him that I would be back tomorrow. He held my hand and said, "Ok, see ya tomorrow." I walked into work today tired, defeated, frustrated because I hate my job, and at times, my life. I walked out of work dedicated to a new cause: to live each day as if it were my last; to leave lasting impressions on every person I meet; to tell my family and friends every day how much I love them; to be the BEST at all things; to enjoy the PROCESS; to slow down; to remember just how blessed I am; to live, love, and have no regrets!

Carpe Diem.