Resting on My Laurels

Rest? What in the world is that?

I wouldn't consider myself a Type A kind of person, but I do have Type A tendencies. I am a multitasker. I like having multiple things going on at once. I thrive in 'organized chaos' environments. I am a can-do type of person!

I don't like the idea of rest. As much as I crave it after a long work week, I usually spend my off days trying to find something to do. And not just some thing...it has to be productive: cooking, cleaning, reading, learning. As my mother would say, I'm always searching for something. How would she know? Probably because she and I are identical in nature!

So, what's my latest project? Phlebotomy! Yes, I have decided to take a phlebotomy course at a local training center. There is no one at my job who is willing to teach me, and this is one of the many skills I should master before starting PA school. So, in two weeks I can add phlebotomist to my short list of credentials! I'm hoping that my CNA/Phleb certifications can land me a job in a hospital setting. That will afford me the opportunity to really get some clinical skills under my belt.

It's Officially Official

As the saying goes, always get it in writing! Well, I did! I finally got my acceptance letter in the mail today! All those feelings are coming back again. It's unreal that this time next year, I will be packing and moving to a new city, all by myself, where I know no one. It's interesting to also think that perhaps two months into my stay, I will have made close, lifelong friends. Everyone says your classmates in PA school become your family away from home. I really look forward to that.

Vindication

Ah...feels good to be home. I have a great evening planned: dinner with a cup of hot tea, and Grey's Anatomy Season 5! I know, I know, but when you've spent the last few years taking prerequisite courses for PA school, you don't have the luxury of watching too much television.

So, I'm at work...working, minding my business, when the social worker comes down my hall to give a guest a tour of our facility. She's doing her very best to impress the guest. As she makes her way down the hall, she stops in front of one of my patients:

Social Worker: "SLP, should this lady be drinking her shake without a straw? You need to go ask the nurse if she can drink this with a straw. We don't want her to choke."

Me: "Well, Mrs. Green is on thickened liquids, and patients on thickened liquids should not drink with straws."

SW: "Well, go ask the nurse 'cause we don't need her to be chokin'."

Me: "OK."

So, I make my way to the nurses' station, all the while rolling my eyes and wondering why she tried to make a fool of me in front of company. I find my nurse, straw in hand:

Me: "Is it ok to have Mrs. Green drinking with a straw. The social worker wanted me to ask."

Nurse (the one I can barely stomach because she will smile in your face and talk about you behind your back): "Well, remember, patients on thickened liquids should not drink with straws. It causes them to cough and can lead to aspiration."

Me: "Right. That's what I thought."

As I turn to walk away, the nurse calls me to come back:

Nurse: "You know, I've been meaning to tell you-well, you know, there is nothing wrong with being a CNA, but I really think you have what it takes to be a wonderful nurse. I've been watching you and you're so observant with the patients, and you need to do whatever you can to go back to nursing school. You would make an excellent...well...I can't believe I'm getting emotional about this...yeah, you would make a great nurse."

Me: "Thank you, Nurse."

Where the hell did this come from? I don't play games with people. You know if I like you, and you know if I don't. There is no way she can think I like her, respect her, or admire her. These words of 'encouragement' were coming from a woman who has praised me to my face, but blamed me for messing up to the DON. This is the woman who told me I needed to "step up my game." This is the nurse who rides me all day, and criticizes every thing I do.

If she only knew. If she only knew!

More Rain

I spent the last hour at work laughing with Ms. Mavis-the 100 year-old firecracker-about how she killed two rats in her dorm room back in college! To look into this woman's eyes is to go back in time! She always has great stories to tell...and if you've been reading this so far, you know I love stories! It was just the kind of ending to my day that I needed, because it started out horribly: only myself and one other CNA on the floor with about 45 patients and no nurses in sight to help. Sure, they can tell you what you need to be doing, but don't count on them to pitch in when times get rough. The mood inside the nursing home echoed the one outside: cold, dreary, and wet. I'm so glad to be home...and I have the weekend off!

Playing Hookie

So...day before yesterday I played hookie from work, spent the whole day with the cop, and had a great time! Sometimes, you just need to play hookie!

It's strange; i've been married for a little over a year, and it feels like much longer than that. I guess that's how marriage goes. The ups and the downs...all of it is part of the game, and each challenge makes the marriage stronger. I'm so blessed to have the cop...to have him choose ME! Insane.

Our new admit, WB, is the sweetest, cutest woman! I don't know exactly what's wrong with her, except she is aphasic, severely contracted and emaciated, and has involuntary tremors. I had the pleasure of feeding her yesterday. It was like feeding a newborn baby. I was in awe of her! It pains me sometimes that I am not able to fully communicate with my patients, either because of language barriers or illness. I often wonder who they are, and what they were when they were young, vibrant members of society. I have so many questions to ask them. I want to take walks down memory lane with them, and experience their lives, their passions, their dreams. Everyone has a story! Hearing and sharing stories is by far the best part about being a medical professional.

Loss

Today was one of the best days I've had at work in a long time. The weekday supervisors were off, the nurses allowed you to do your job, and everyone worked together as a team. Why can't every day at work be like this?

Today I found out that we lost a patient on my floor yesterday. JT was a sweet woman; never bossy or demanding. Always low maintenance. She was a bit of a cynic, perhaps because of her condition. She had end stage heart disease, unbeknownst to me and the other CNA's, and was on hospice care. We all knew she wouldn't be with us for long, but I didn't know what she would be dying from, nor did I know she would leave us so soon. She had only been with us for about a month.

When I passed by her bed today, it was empty...neatly made. I knew something was wrong because JT NEVER got out of bed. It broke my heart to hear of her demise. Life is so precious, and we all take it for granted.

Here we go again

So...just got off the phone with my home institution. Yeah, the university I attended over 6 years ago. They are still in the business of giving people the run-around.

I've been accepted to PA school. However, I have been accepted provisionally, meaning there are certain requirements that must be met before I can attend. Finishing my degree is one of those provisions. I have been trying to finish this degree for over 4 years, and every time I try there seems to be a brick wall in my way. Why is it so hard to transfer credits from one place to another? Why do universities look down on community college courses? Why does this have to be so hard?

I have two options: either be allowed to take the one course I need to graduate here at home, or uproot, move miles away from home, and attend school at my home institution. As upset and frustrated as I am, I cannot let anything stand in the way of me and PA school.